Got any extra willpower?

Uuuggghhh! Why does bad food have to taste soooo good? Why does exercising have to be work? Why do I not have any willpower. Why am I so lazy?

I'm trying, excuse me, wishing I were actually trying and not just pretending to try, to lose some weight. After I got married, I was able to to maintain my weight for the first couple of years... but then I guess I got comfortable in the married life and started letting it all hang out. So over the past few years, I've been adding weight.

Jason and I decided to set weight goals for ourselves for 2012. If we hit those goals on May 31st, then on June 1st we were booking a December cruise. Why December? That would give us the time to build up the money/pay off the trip. Plus we like to get the hell outta dodge when it's cold here. Ya know, go somewhere warm and laugh at our friends and family that are stuck here in Coldsville.

My total weight loss goal is 40lbs. By May 31st. Totally doable. I broke it down into baby steps to make the end goal less daunting - if I could lose just 2 pounds a week, I'd actually be a tiny bit over my goal by the due date. TWO FRICKIN' MEASLY POUNDS. Yeah, it's the last full week of January and how am I doing? Wellllll, at least I haven't gained.

I just have no willpower when it comes to food. I love all the bad, unhealthy stuff and think that all the "good for you" crap tastes like... well, crap. I'm usually pretty good about getting to the gym (going about 4 times a week and then working out a 5th day at home). But even that's fallen to the wayside lately. I haven't worked out since last Wednesday. As in January 18th (my birthday). Damn. It. I'm supposed to be training for a 1/2 marathon that I'm doing at the end of March. Crap! In my defense, I haven't been working out because things have been super busy at Moorefield Mansion (disclaimer: Moorefield Mansion may not be a real mansion). But, that's not an excuse. You're supposed to find time to exercise.... But, I've seriously misplaced that time (it's gotta be around here somewhere!)

Since I haven't been exercising lately, I've been trying to eat somewhat healthier than normal. By this I mean watching my portions and trying to cut out snacking. One thing that's helping is we actually don't have anything worthwhile to snack on in the house. We do have some popcorn - both the microwavable kind and "kernels for the air popper" kind. The only reason I'm not chowing down on any of that is because I'm too lazy to actually make any of it. Huh, my laziness does come in handy sometimes. Oh last weekend we bought ice cream (which I was craving), but the kind we bought was disgusting, so that killed my craving. Hmmmmm, note to self - buy more of that crap.

Anyhoo - after a long day at work, Jason and I decided to go out to eat. Where did we go? To a pizza buffet joint. Oh swell. Just what we needed. A plethora of food at our disposal. We actually stayed pretty contained, though! We probably ate more than we should have, but we didn't eat nearly as much as we normally do at buffets.... I stopped before I hit that miserable point.

But then we screwed ourselves by going across the street to Dewey's Bakery. We were going to get one cake square a piece. But Dewey's suckered us. They have a deal where if you get 5 of any baked goods, you get 1 free. Well, 5 + 1 = HELL YEAH! There are 2 of us and HELL YEAH divides equally between 2. We couldn't pass up that deal... Damn you, Dewey's, damn you.

Soooo, I'll keep you posted on this weight loss thingy. But for now, please excuse me. I have a cake square calling my name.